A couple swear words and a story

I remember the first time I swore very vividly. I was in the kitchen, and my sister Amber and I were grating on each other. High School was rough for our relationship. I was a mess in all sorts of ways, and my sister certainly got the brunt of it. Anyways, I was in the kitchen and I yelled "GO TO HELL!" The whole house quieted, I immediately knew I didn't want her to "go to hell," whatever that meant. That was the first time.

The second time I swore was my Junior year in High School. Chemistry class. My friend, Val, and I took the class together. I was pretty excited to take Chemistry because I already had a great part of the Periodic Table of Elements memorized because my Dad thought it was great to have his children memorize random facts and this included the elements, and their atomic weight and numbers. . . I digress. The teacher from day one was someone I rubbed wrong and visa versa. Her name was Ms. Hoffenbeck... so immediately I called her Ms. Hoffenb*tch...sorry mom. I hated her. I have no reason why. Probably just my teenage angst and she was just the lucky target of the week. Val may remember a better reason. I never said it more than a couple times, but never-the-less it was the second time.

Now the story...

In said Chemistry class, Val and I worked on a comic strip. It is about Joe and his pig named Hamlet. To this day when I hear the name Hamlet, I snicker to myself as I think of this silly comic strip. The one page, back and front of which only a handful of squares got colored. When I first rediscovered it, I thought about coloring the rest in, but it makes me laugh even harder to think we didn't even have time to finish it. The words comic strip are to be used very loosely here.

It should be said that I think I got a C in this class, but I still remember quite a few elements and their numbers and weights. SO THERE! Sorry, moving on...

It was titled THE PITCHFORK. Enjoy...

THE PITCHFORK

by Valerie Johnson Brown & Melissa Singleton

Hamlet. Yeah, we were pretty darn clever.

Goolash. That was before we could Google what pigs ate.

Juniors in High School... that is America, folks!

See, nothing in the cupboard, BROKE!

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In the tree, it's a bird. Yes, it is. Also it is to be noted that any time I planned on running away I would wrap a crust of bread into a handkerchief and tie it to a scarf, I never packed a suit case. It always seemed more legit that way. Like I was committed to living a vagrants life.

Maybe in our heads, it was the neighbors' house?

Notice the pitchfork you can barely tell is a pitchfork below under the window. Foreshadowing...

Random Bible reference, of course?

Like ya do.

It was never finished... but remember how there was a pitchfork below the loft... well that plays into the unfortunate end of this comic?

So, you are welcome. Or, I apologize for wasting your time. But, mostly I speak for both Val and I when I say... you are welcome, and I will answer your next question as well: I have NO idea WHY we didn't pursue this as a career.

And I have said a handful less appropriate words since then as well. Just a handful. *wink.